HARRY

SCARED AND CONFUSED

Q: Dear Harry,

I think I may be pregnant, what should I do? Please give me some advice.

Signed,

Worried Girl

A: Dear Worried Girl,

You have every reason to worry, getting pregnant is a serious matter that takes a lot of planning and discussion before it is ready happen. When occuring spontaneously it can cause intense family turmoil.

First thing is first, get tested. You have to know for sure whether or not this is a definite issue. Once you get the results you need to tell your family members and more importantly the father of the child. The next step is the most challenging one: you must decide whether or not you want to keep it. This decision has to be made by yourself despite the ethical and political beliefs of your family and community.

Whatever decision you may make I hope that you can teach others a valuable lesson: It is always better to wait to have sex. 

Keep a positive attitude,

Hi-Tide Harry

VIRGINia

Q: Dear Harry,

Shoud I lose my virginity to be in the "in" crowd? I am so confused. Please help.

Signed,

VIRGINia

A: Dear VIRGINia,

The obvious answer to this question is no. You shouldn't do anything just to fit in, especiallly lose your virginity. Having sex concerns you, and you only; this is your body and you shouldn't have you peers make such a crucial life impacting decision for you.

I hope that you learn to make all of your choices by yourself, and more importantly not allow the "in" crowd to make them for you. Dont be afraid to be who you are and  stand up for what you believe.

Your friend,

Hi-Tide Harry

DANCING WITH LOVE

Q: Dear Harry:

I like this senior guy in my dance class, he is nice and really sweet. But I dont think he likes me since I am just a freshman and he's a senior. Should I tell him? Please tell me something.

Signed,

Confusing Choregraphy

A: Dear Dancing With Love,

Age plays a big factor in all relationships, and some people don't feel comfortable dating a significantly older or younger person. You should take this into serious consideration if you plan on confessing your feelings.

My advice to you is to give it some time and see how it plays out. Find out how he feels about you: pay attention to his body language, and the way he acts around you. If you feel confident enough, after observing his actions, then you should go for it!

Be patient,

Hi-Tide Harry

TRUTH VS. FRIENDSHIP

Q: Dear harry,

One of my friends has a crush on one of my other good friends, but he does not like her. He says that she is too tall for him. Should I tell her the truth? 

Signed,

Snoobby

A: Dear Snoobby,

Telling a friend the truth about something that may be offensive is a very hard thing to do. You have to ask yourself how your friend will react to the harsh reality.

It is probably better if your friend knows that the person she likes does not like her, but if she cant handle the truth you should just let her find out on her own way.

Hope this helps,

Hi-Tide Harry

STRESSED OUT/FED UP

Q: Dear Harry,

I have an issue. I have a tendency to overload my daily routine. I'm always on the go and I constantly take on more projects to better prepare myself for college. Sometimes, though, I feel like it's just too much. I know I can do the work, and I know I can handle it, but I'm kind of fed up. Sometimes I question if it's all worth it. What if I don't even get into my dream school? Then what?

Sincerely,

Stressed out

A: Dear stressed out,

We all have to put up with things we don't want to, its just a question of how much you can endure. All you can do is be the best you can be, even if that means pushing yourself to your limit. Only you know how far you can go, and it is up to you to make those decisions.

The work that you do will always be worth it, even if you don't get into your dream school. You should always strive to be the best; this way you know you did all you could. Remember: the responsibilities you are taking on now will pay off in the future.

P.S. learn to love your projects.

Your friend,

Hi-Tide Harry.

HOPELESSLY IN LOVE

Q: Dear Harry ,

My boyfriend and I tend to argue a lot. I really care about him so when we argue it really hurts me. The last thing I ever want to do is hurt him but I really do not know what to do anymore. We have broken up but we never follow through with it. We always get back together, and then break up again because we keep fighting

Help me please ,

Hopelessly In Love

A: Dear Hopelessly in Love,

You need to take a long hard look at the relationship you are in right now. The fact that you keep fighting says that you have some clear differences, but this is usually the case in many relationships. You need to come to terms with the fact that you will have differences; it just depends whether or not you are willing to put up with them.

Every relationship requires sacrifices; so if you care about this person, disagreements should not get in the way of your relationship. On the other hand, if you feel that the fighting is just too much to handle and cannot be resolved, then you should consider a breakup.

Hope you figure things out,

Hi-Tide Harry.

SHY AND IN-LIKE

Q: Dear Harry,

I really like this boy, but I don't know if he likes me back. How do I find out without actually saying the words "I like you"? I don't want to scare him off.

Signed,

Shy and "in-Like"

A: Dear Shy and "in-like",

People get crushes all the time unfortunately the attraction is not always mutual. A person can like someone for a long time and not even know if the feeling is reciprocal. One way you can find out if this boy likes you is to be observant; watch his body language, especially his eyes. The eyes can tell you more than you think about a person.

Try and develop a closer bond, and when you feel more comfortable with him, maybe you will feel more comfortable about telling him how you feel. Don't be afraid to take a chance,

Good luck,

Hi-Tide Harry.

VIOLENT PARENTS

Q: Dear Harry,

My parents seem to be getting more and more violent everyday I dont know what to do - please help me!

Please Advise,

Violent Parents

A: Dear Violent Parents,

All families have their own issues to deal with and some are more serious than others. Violence comes in two primary forms: verbal and physical. If the issue is verbal you should talk to your father or mother and explain to them that you are not comfortable with all the verbal abuse going on. On the other hand, if the issue is domestic violence, you should report the issue to a trustworthy family member or the authorities.

The number one thing you should know is that the fighting going on in your family has nothing to do with you. It is not your fault.

Stay strong,

Hi-Tide Harry.

LEAVE-ME-ALONE

Q: Dear Harry,

My mom is always in my business, and I want to be away from her. Does that make me a mean person? What should I do?

-Leave-Me-Alone

A: Dear Leave-Me-Alone,

You are not a mean person for wanting some personal time. Your mother loves you very much and only wants what is best for you.  Caring about your business shows how much she cares about you. If you feel like she is getting on your nerves, you should just talk to her and work out a set of reasonable boundaries. 

The only way your mother is going to trust you is if you talk to her and explain what is going on in your life. In the end, hopefully in time, your mother will trust the decisions you make. 

Hope this Helps,
Hi-Tide Harry

SOCIALLY STRESSED

Q: Dear Harry,
How can I handle schoolwork and grades, and still feel complete with my social life without feeling overstressed?

Advice Please,
Socially Stressed

A: Dear Socially Stressed,

You probably want to be successful and attend a university, which does mean that you will have to study hard and make good grades. Of course, social life is important.   If you budget your time wisely, you should be able to manage both. The key to budgeting your time is organization.  You can even make a chart if you want: make a list of all your priorities and number their importance 1-5. 

This helps make sure you get things done and out of the way so that you can enjoy your social life.  Stress is something that one must learn to overcome - in time you will learn how to handle stressful situations more efficiently.

Try to relax,
Hi-Tide Harry